emptiness

i feel empty. like my life has no purpose and i don't know why. it's terrible absolutley terrible. i feel like crying it's so bad but i can't physically bring myself to do it. i wish i could feel something, anything. my soul feels as if the angel of death has passed by and looked upon me and said you shall be no longer and killed the part of me that feels and thrives. apparently that is no longer. im numb and i still feel hatred and anger and that's it and it runs through my blood as hot as the firey pits of hell if such a place existed. i can no longer say in good faith if there is a good god and we are all that beings children. if there was a good god he wouldn't allow a good person to feel like they're in hell, he wouldn't let his children go to hell he would stop them from the thing that would have sent them there. no there is no truly good god. there may be a higher being but they are a sadist and allows people to suffer when they can intervine and they would be able to if they supposedly created everything. no there is no good god. i wish there was . i don't want this life to be a test for a monster.

midnight writer

i forgot what i was doing

i have a bad memory. i mean really bad. i mean so bad that i can't remember what i had for breakfast and it's noon, bad. for those out there with bad memories we need to unite with the procrastinators (which i am as well) sometime in the near future and don't forget to write it down. wait, what am typing about now?! let me reread this hold on...oh ok so as i was saying yes we need to unite so we may learn the secrets of those with good memories and non procrastinators! we must unite if are to remember a funny conversation or what time our surprise party starts that you overheard your parents talking about! we must for if we don't our life will suck! we shall our selves la resistance because that is an easy name to remember and if you forget just watch the south park movie! viva la resistance!

midnight writer

I am pleased to say I was wrong

I know odd to say i was pleased that i was wrong but i really am. as you my reader have seen my lack of confidence in america's intellect to elect obama. well i change my stance on who is going to win. i now believe mccain will lose due to the current electoral votes and mccain's poor choice for a vice president, sarah palin, who can apparently see russia from her house. just thought i should share that little tid bit of information. oh and if you watched the debate last night i found mccain's desperate and pathetic arguments (that he said over and over rather than answer the question) very amusing. oh remember to watch tina fey on saturday night live, she's hilarious!

midnight writer

Mixed

Evil and pure,
Good and bad,
so thin are lines,
that one day,
everything becomes,
gray

Believe it or not this poem is in the semi-finals of an actual poetry contest! I am so exited! I hope I place in the top 100 but that is just wishful thinking...oh well that's life for you always hoping even if you know you can't have. I just checked and this is my first blog with out spelling mistakes! yeah me!

midnight writer

Summer vacation

You know that feeling of totall and utter boredom you get from free time during summer vacation? the one where you have nothing really special to do so it feels like the day is never going to end and you just sit there thimking man i've been waiting for this day all school year and now that its here it really really sucks and then a few weeks pass like this and finally its a week before school and youre all like man i cant believe schools starting and wish summer vacation were longer and then realize man ohb this is what summer vacay. is like this sucks! and so you try and fit fun things in and run short of time. yeah that is exactly what happens to me every summer.

midnight writer

Animals

-I personally love animals. I think they are cute and adorable and should be treated with respect because without them there wouldn't have been an us.

-No im not a vegetarian because i also beleive in the almighty food web that helps balances out all the species. i say hey if animals eat animals why cant i eat animals to? i mean seriously all living consious beings are animals including humans so im just following the natural order by eating beings not as intelligent as my race.

-If this sounds a little gurgled to you its because im half asleep and i cant fall asleep so im typing to help with the task of falling asleep. is that understandable? because it sure isnt to me.

midnight writer

The Night

In the night one stirs
Never knowing whats about to occur
Silent until the moment strikes
Then all is over
It is at an end


I just got the inspiration for thiis one while i was sitting jin front of the computer just now.

midnight writer

notifications

-Seriously guys i know your imaginary but could you at least try to put up a comment or two!All you do is hit comment and type something... anything!Is that so uber difficult!?

-On a lighter note im listening to jesus of surburbia by green day. Its pretty cool. and i just finished my three days grace cd i just got. Now i skipped over to the soothing works of brahms.

-FYI sock tans are for cool kids and fully tanned people can go eat a lemon pop for all i care!

-A wise sentence
-The best things in life are best unseen, that's why we close our eyes when we kiss, cry and dream. -a piece of flair from face book
-And some advice
-Even in the darkest of times the smallest light can make all the difference.

midnight writer

over reactions

you know what really makes me miffed? its when someone does something totally on accident and it really is no big deal and then the person that it happened to overreacts.
-like today in p.e. we were playing dodgeball and i caught the ball ran and threw it and i wasnt paying attention to who was there because the person i wanted to get out wasnt paying attention and i wanted to strike so i threw the ball and my hand accidentally hit some asian chick in the chest and i know that its ttly wrong to do that and i would be pissed if someone did that to me but if it was an accident and it was a person who i didnt even have any reason to hate i would have moved on after they apologized for like a minute which i did and then she was all like stay away from me and so i walked away after apologizing again and the the game was over like 4 minutes later and shes still talking about and making it sound like i touched her on purpose and i say whats your problem it was an accident and shes all like didnt i say stay away from me and i was a good 2-3 feet away and she came closer to me and i said i am and i dont know it was just an over reaction. and i absolutely hate her now because there was no reason for her behavior i never even spoken to her before god she was a bitch.
-i would love to hear other stories like mine so do tell.

midnight writer

poetry beginings

Spoils of the Dead-
Two fairies it was
On a still summer day
Come forth in the woods
With the flowers to play.

The flowers they plucked
They cast on the ground
For others, and those
For still others they found.

Flower-guided it was
That they came as they ran
On something that lay
In the shape of a man.

The snow must have made
The feathery bed
When this one fell
On the sleep of the dead.

But the snow was gone
A long time ago,
And the body he wore
Nigh gone with the snow.

The fairies drew near
And keenly espied
A ring on his hand
And a chain at his side.

They knelt in the leaves
And eerily played
With the glittering things,
And were not afraid.

And when they went home
To hide in their burrow,
They took them along
To play with tomorrow.

When you came on death,
Did you not come flower-guided
Like the elves in the wood?
I remember that I did.

But I recognized death
With sorrow and dread,
And I hated and hate
The spoils of the dead.

-Robert Frost
ok i felt like putting a poetry section in and this is one of my favorite authors so if you have any poems post them in comments and i might put them up.

midnight writer

balance

A fireman saving a cat from a flame,
A pyromaniac setting the fire,
A woman raped,
A prodigy born,
New allies formed,
Rebels starting a war,
A father leaving his child,
A soul becomes stronger,
Buying a car with your own money,
Car crash kills three people,
Love is newly formed,
Young hearts break enemies emerge,
Man saves child from a truck,
The man dies,
A sick forest burns,
New trees bud,
Love,
Hate,
Life,
Death,
Yin,
Yang,
The World

midnight writer

elemental arguement

The elements speak to one another
They compare traits that each one contains
Water boasts how it can be healer
Air says it’s no longer bound by chains
Fire spreads how it can keep heat
Earth calls on how it is very tough
All of these are a very big feat
Each element can’t have what is enough
They all bicker each time they convene
On only one subject of who is the best
Turmoil thrums through becoming very mean
But forever bound on only one crest
The pentacle says the spirit mother
For they all truly need one another

midnight writer

the game

Playing under many a tree,
Sun smiling upon them with glee.
Running through soft glowing meadows,
Enjoying the summer with plenty of fellows.
Times are passing without notice,
Soon enough it is the summer solstice.
Not long winter shines its cold pale face,
As if Jack Frost knew what was about to take place.
Over the meadow snow will surely fall,
Slowly enveloping all.
Many changes do occur,
Time passes in a blur.
That quick devil time is,
This game is always the same through the ages.
Sun and light,
Versus dark and night.

midnight writer

twilight series and its characters

ok the twilight series consists of four books so far Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn. for those who haven't read Stephinie Meyer's best sellers, it's about a girl named Bella who falls in love with a "vampire" named Edward Cullen.
-the first book Bella moves to Forks, W.A. with her father. Then she sees Edward, falls in love with him with out any basis for that love and finds out he and his family are "vegetarian" "vampires" who don't eat people and then some nomad vamps come and they try to eat Bella , blah blah blah.
-the second book Edward leaves Bella and becomes depressed. In her depression she becomes friends with Jacob Black who turns out to be a werewolf. She finds out Edward thought she died and is going to go kill himself, she saves him blah blah blah.
-the third book the Cullens return werewolves and vamps. feud. Jacob and Edward are competeing for Bella. one of the nomads from book one comes back the vamps. and werewolves help each other in beating her army of new borns. they win of course (rolling my eyes). Jacob runs away because Edward and Bella are getting married blah blah blah.
-the fourth and hopefully final book is Breaking Dawn. this is one of the stupidest pieces of literature (if it can even be called that) in the history of forever. seriously im not exaderating. okthis is what happens: Bella and Edward get married. obvious. then they have sex and somehow concieve a baby. which is impossible if Edward can't even produce tears how can he produce sperm? that's the first third..oh yeah Jacob comes back and almost kills Edward ...go Jake..but didnt because Stephenie Meyer is mormon and doesn't do violence. remember that for later. the 2nd third is in Jakes point of view which means all thoughts are emo about the baby cuz its not his and oh yeah its killing Bella( it almost sucessedsd but doesnt...damnit). it's born and he imprints on it turning him into a pedophile (seriously he loves a minute old baby like no other) and that brings us to Bella again what a drag. so the fucktard baby with a fucktard name, Renesmee aka Nessie,(again the author is mormon) almost kills Bella but instead of dying Edward turns her into a vampire. all of a sudden shes not clumsy and still doesnt have a personality except being more cocky. the Volturi get wind of the baby. come to kill the Cullens and there are like a million horny "vampires" there ready for battle which is like sex to them and it ends with a peaceful resolution because yes you geussed it the author is mormon and so it ends with no one getting a booboo or even emotional pain (seriously i was very disappointed) and everyone lives happily ever after. the end. the only good thing about this book is it makes a good door stop and Alice and Jasper ditch them for awhile but is ruined because it turns out they left to find help not for anything fun like family betrayal...oh wait i forgot a minor character dies because Caius is a bastard but i dont blame him Irina sucked anyway.good bye to a series of failure.
-my favorite is new moon but i've found everyone hates that book except one other dude who ttly agrees with me when i say its the best because its so different.
-alright now thats out of the way i can get on with why im writing this im writing this to finally get out on what i think about the characters.
-i believe Bella is a stupid dits who the only intelligent she has ever done is write a intricate paper on shakespeare. no she is not stubborn because she compromises or gives in on like everything! she is to self conscious and i think she is way to gullible. she cant see the obvious half the time and its uber annoying. overall she has no personality and i just dont really like her.
-Edward is only in love with Bella in my opinion because shes a mystery because he cant read her mind (because if you could trust me not very interesting) and she smells good to him.he is constantly lying to her so that makes everything he does questionable because in the words of jack sparrow "a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly, it's the honest one you need to watch out for because you can never predict when they're gonna do something incredibly... stupid." and i have to agree, Edward you can always trust to be dishonest seriously. you dont even know if he's smart people say it but where's the proof! he is over protective and easily angered and he is just ugh! but he is incredibly good looking "he's so good looking you have to make up a new word like sexyfine and even this potent word doesnt describe how good looking he is" sorry just had to add it its from avatar the abriged series on youtube.
-Alice ( Edwards "sister") she is an awesome character. she has an awesome personality but if you think about it she is sort of ruthless in getting what she wants no matter what other people want which is kinda funny seeing as she looks so sweet when you first met her dont get me wrong she is nice but just a tad to i cant think of the word but shes the sort of person who likes to make her self happy by controlling things with out being controlling.
-Jacob is to bitter. i liked him before he became a werewolf when he was still sweet and young and happy now he's just bitter which is not good. i dont like bitter Jacob its to conflicting with his original character.
-Emmet is one of edwards brothers and although hes not a major person hes my favorite. he's like a big brother or the adult who looks really intimidating but has a childs heart and is as playful as a kitty. i just like him so i added him. Emmet rocks! He is the only one in the series who I wouldn't mind actually meeting
-that what i think so add!

midnight writer

jello

jello is very awesome. if you think about it you could do so much to it. you can change its shape, size, color flavor, stuff thats in it, solibility and many other things and still does a bang up job of being a refreshing snack. my personal favorite is red cherry but i also like blue flavor. but i say hey as long as its jiggly then im cool with it.i actually feel like having some now but i dont feel like getting up. so i say give your salute to jello its some amazing stuff.

midnight writer

jews, blacks and racism

-ok i am fucking tired of hearing blacks in america saying well im being oppressed because my ancestors were slaves. to them i say screw you look, black people a) if your anscetors were part of the slave trade they would have been slaves anyway in africa so shut the fuck up and b) if you are under thirty or forty you never were legally discriminated against so dont even try it you never went through it. and if your a "gangster" you shut the hell up about the police hating you because your black unless your in a hick state then never mind but if your in a civilized state and your a gangbanger its your fault your the ones breaking the laws.
- if any one has the right to complain about racism its the jews. the jews have been hated against since biblical times hell its even in the bible about the eygptians. hell we also have the romans, crusades, the holocaust and now the palastinians. there are probably many more but those were on the top of my head. jews were even discriminated here. my grandmother said that when she was growing up that a college would not accept you if your picture looked to "jewy".
- hell i my self have been discriminated against by a teacher when i was in third grade. she was all sweet to me i got good grades awards for being well behaved and one day she played a song with jesus and i said "im sorry ms. ashley i cant sing this song im jewish" and i countinued my normal pattern and then it started to happen my grades dropped my rewards that deserved ended my role as the good sister in a play we were doing was switched to the evil ugly one i wasnt allowed to do the fun arts and crafts i was treated worse than the class theft and i did nothing to deserve this i was the shy quite person of the class i never talked out of turn i always raised my hand and still thats what happened. only until later did i learn her first husband was a you guessed it a nazi. yeah i cant believe it either.
-so blacks shut up your not the only ones and we hade it much worse much more recently in history.

midnight writer

religion

-when man first thought a thought that differed from the animals around them, ever since imagination and intellect was formed there has been some sort of religion, whether it be the observance of seeing spirits in nature or a belief of one almighty being there has been some sort of supernatural worship system.
-there have been many conflicts over the period of time since religion was formed. no matter what religion there have been struggles over whose right and whose wrong and i just want to say that is the most ludicrous reason i have ever heard for there to be a fight of epic proportions. i want all religions to understand each other so i am going to give my views on some religions.
-polytheist- or paganism is the belief in more than one god or belief in spirits (im not sure about that last part) no, pagans are not likely satanists and most religions actually both pagan and monotheist believe you shoul be a good person( sorry if i dont get in your religion im not familiar with a lot of polytheist religions)
wiccanism- wicca is an old religion who believe in the two main figures the god and the gdddess. this religion believes in the power of nature and the spiritual uses of every thing. like i said earlier wiccans are not evil they actually have a rule whatever you put out in the universe comes back to three fold so being bad is not a very smart thing to be. i know a few wiccans and they are actually pretty cool they're a little hippyish but thats just them there are probably conservative wiccans out there somewhere.
hinduism- ok this is one of the of the religions i dont know much about. all i know is they have many gods and you cant convert to being hindu you are hindu inheritally. im pretty sure they believe in reincarnation but if im wrong and your hindu i apologize. ive actually been to a hindu temple and ithought it was pretty nice i had to take my shoes off though. i have a couple of hindi friends they're pretty cool to but i think most of my friends are cool so you cant go by me on that.
-monotheism- monothiest believe in the existence of one god the three i will be disscusing actually worship the same gode butdifferent aspects.
juadism- the jews are the oldest montheists that i know about. this is the root for the two major religions christianity and islam. you know its funny i was raised jewish but i dont know what to say. jews follow the first testament or called the torah. i dont which are the major holidays and no hannukah is not one of them. i think the major ones are passover and yom kipper orthodox jews are uber strict about stuff but no worries i was raised reform. oh yeah jews eat kosher so that means no pork and no meat with dairy. its to cleanse the soul or something. well the more conservative the jew the more polite i find them except my grandparents but they were uber old so watev. what i want christians and muslims to understand is with out the jews you guys wouldnt even have a religion so stop picking on them and stop making them the scapegoats.
christianity(this includes catholics and jews for jesus)- i consider a christian is any one who believes jesus christ was the lord and savior hence the name christians. christians are basically jews that believe in jesus( well there you go catholics and jews for jesus) hell even jesus was a jew. christianity is the observance of both the old and the new testament. they celebrate chirtmas and easter for most branches. since mostly everyone i know is christian i cant say if this religion makes you good or bad because i also take in acount history so jews have my sympathy(no im not being biased) and well let the cruades speak for them selves although im not naming names(cough christians cough muslims cough). oh i almost forgot christians believe jesus died for their sins and then was ressurected i cant believe i almost forgot that! oh yeah its the largest reliugion in the world.
islam- muslims follow the prophet muhammad i believe. there are the sunni and the shiites. they follow the karon (sorry if i missed spelled that). i dont know the difference between the two but i think it was who they followed after muhammad died. you jnow its sad thats all i know about this religion other than they dont eat pork also and i should know more im part of the m.s.a.at my school. all the muslim people i met are pretty sweet except hanajima shes kick ass awesome. just know not all muslims are like the ones on the news thats only a small poercent of the second largest religion in the world.

-sorry if i got anything wrong or if i offended you in any way by being an ignorant git but if what i wrote about the religions are true i mean the facts and stuff then screw you those are my opinions and if there is anything you'd like to add leave a comment and i shall to it that i might remember to look over some of the things you wrote.

midnight writer

presidetial candidates

-ok here is my political view i am: independent leaning toward Democrat. this however does not change my views on the political candidates. if i were of legal voting age i would have voted for colbert because even though it was a gag run i think he would have brought in a fresh wind to the white house. this is why i didnt choose the other two. (i never thought clinton would win so she doesnt count)
-o'bama is pro Palestinian and i am a firm supporter of Israel and i dont want a president who would condone the people bombing the lands of my ancestors and i believe his wife is racist towards other religious groups (cough jews cough) and the first lady has a lot of influence of over the president.
-mccain is pro war and wants to keep our troops in iraq for another hundred years and i just dont support this war. i will go in to that one in another blog. and mccain is old as hell and i dont want him dying and dumping all his problems on the vice president in the middle of his term.
- i think mccain will win. i know right wouldnt america be smart and choose change and progress and actually try to help our economy by bringing our troops home but i have learned although this is the land of the free it is not the land of sudden change. i knew mccain would win from the beginning because he's familiar. his campaign has to do with war and you have to realize we as a country have always been involved in some kind of war whether its on a battlefield, in a courtroom with politics, or with our foreign trade economic system. our entire country was formed from a war that involved all three of those factors. hell we went to war with ourselves for those factors also. we may be slowly changing but it took almost two centuries for blacks to have an equal say even now blacks feel they are being oppressed and they honestly expect him to win. for Hillary supporters it took until the 1920's for women to vote we just got through to speaker of the house the third in line for presidency so cool it your almost there. we have had around 46 presidents all have been white, male and Protestant (except one was catholic) so seriously people you can make the logical leap as to follow the pattern and see who will be the next leader of the free world.

midnight writer

myspace vs. face book

-in all honesty i do have both a myspace and a facebook so i can say which is better in my opinion.
-i must say i favor facebook because it's easier to use and it's also safer but maybe a smidge to safe because you cant even find your friends if they have the uber safe settings i mean seriously what's the point if you can't find your friends.
-as for myspace it is cooler because a) itwas first and b) you can do more things to it. i say screw all the people who say its not safe becausethe only way they canget the kid to go over to them and form a perverted relationship is if the kid originally says hey why not approve him as a friend otherwise if they dont do that they are perfectly safe.
-so yes i like facebook more but you cant forget myspace is still pretty cool.


midnight wrtiter

books and the mind numbing afterwards

-i don't know why but why is it that when you finish a good book your mind numbs out even though it doesn't usually do that?
-i just finished the summer land king and even now my mind is numb and i cant really concentrate. it's taking all i have to write this and i don't know why. i feel like I'm about to fall asleep and my arms and legs and eyes are feeling heavy but i cant cave into sleep. so why does this phenomena occur even when you've conditioned your brain for it and it doesn't strike until later.
-i would understand if it happened late at night but at six in the afternoon it makes no sense. i mean seriously what the fuck. oh well just a mystery i guess.
-fyi the summer land king has a crappy ending and generation dead sorta is starting to suck towards the end aussi.(the last word is french)

midnight writer

books that become movies

-as many of my readers (cough cough) may know twilight a best selling book is being made into a movie. many people have seen the commercials including me and i have to say it is saddening to see a magnificent book demeaned into such a movie that it is hardly recognizable. unfortunatly many other if not most books made into movies i.e. blood and chocolate, have been mutilated and destroyed.
- once the movie comes out the book seems less iportant to future readers if it is not done well and if the movie is a flop we usually lose the book to the space of time for the next generation would not want to read a book in which they think will suck all thanks to the movie.
-however not all movies based on books are inaccurate for example the princess bride was so close to the book i swear they used the same dialouge. so i would like to hear what other people have to say on this topic. so imaginary people get typing.

midnight writer

intro to my blog

ok this is my first blog ever and i created it as sort of a thing that covers random things for different people.

today i have no idea what to write about so sorry. as if anyone would read this except the imaginary people in my head.

funny factoid if a real person reads this i am an awful speller so dont get mad if i spell many things incorrectly.


midnight writer